What happened last time?
Wow this blocker has been big for me.
I had six children in 9 years which is delightful (and hard work) but it had taken its toll on my body, especially the last two who are only 18 months apart.
So when my baby was two and I stopped breastfeeding, I decided to go on a diet. I went to Jenny Craig. It worked. I was one of the first diets I ever went on and I found it easy. I was very committed and keen and stuck to the plan perfectly. The weight fell off and I was close to goal weight within 3 months. Their goal weight was too low for me, and it was interesting how my commitment disappeared once I was happy with how I looked.
I was excited in my new body. I went out and bought a whole wardrobe of new clothes, I learnt about the right colours for me, and it really helped bring my whole life from frumpy, breastfeeding, and pregnant, to young fit 30-year-old. I started doing a whole gamut of exercises like swimming, squash, basketball and running (because I wanted to improve my squash game). I felt alive. I was at university studying for my Batchelor’s Degree which had been a long-held dream for me.
And I became dissatisfied with my marriage. I was unhappy. I didn’t feel like he cared about the me I was becoming. He was upset with all the things I was doing outside of the home. I changed. Now personally I see this as part of the natural course of growing up, and not a bad thing, but it caused massive problems for both of us and within a few years our marriage was over.
Fast forward 10 years and I am now divorced and remarried and have two more children and wanting to lose the excess weight that I have gained, so I go back to Jenny Craig with the expectation that it will be easy just like it was last time. I did not lose any weight at all!!
I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t stick to the plan, I always felt hungry. I sabotaged myself every day. If only I knew then what I know now!! At the time I felt so mad at myself. I was so frustrated and could not figure out what was wrong with me. I quit that diet and proceeded to go on more and more diets. Each time believing their advertising that this was the diet that would work. And none of them did.
I got mad at my body, started going to the gym and doing lots of exercises. I even became a personal trainer. I went hiking and walked for hours every day. Nothing moved the weight down.
Many things moved the weight up.
Now I weigh more than ever before but I have learnt about these weight loss blockers.
Like most people I have elements of each of the blockers, but there are a couple that are big stand outs and this one, “What happened last time” is an obvious one.
I went on a diet lost the weight, got my dream body and the rest of my life blew up. Why would I want to do that again? Sure, my body is not where I want it to be, but the rest of my life is wonderful. I don’t want to mess with that.
Now if this is not one of your blockers you will be reading my story and not seeing a problem. And of course, you are right. I am nearly 40 years older; my children are all grown, my relationships are stable. There is nothing to fear. But that is not how the subconscious works.
Our subconscious brain wants to keep us safe. It keeps us away from the cliffs edge, tells us not to play with snakes, and helps us see when we are in danger. And it thinks I am in danger. If I lose the weight, my life will blow up and I will be the single mother struggling for money and coping with lots of little kids by myself.
The solution is to let my subconscious brain know that I am safe. That I know what I am doing, and it will work out well. To process the emotional trauma.
I use a tool called EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique to help the body process the trauma. I help people to feel the feelings that they experienced at the time and tell about the experience all while tapping on a few meridian points on the face and upper body, which enables the body to rewire the brain and release the trauma.
Once the fear has gone, and the events of the past are exactly that – events in the past we can decided how I or a client want to feel and program that in.
What I want to feel when I am at goal weight
I can trust myself.
It is safe for me to be at my goal weight.
I always make great decisions when I am at my goal weight.
I love the new me.
I look good and I love it.
I can be my ideal weight and be a person I admire.
I love my ideal my body and I can enjoy being fit and strong.
I am worthy of healthy love.
I give myself permission for this to be easy.
What are the feelings you would like to have when you are at your goal weight?
If you would like to discuss finding out why you are stopping yourself from losing weight book here (https://kaybayly.as.me/askmeanthing) for a free chat.