Have you ever had the experience where someone asks you “What do you love doing?” and your mind is completely blank. You cannot think of one thing that you actually love to do.
Maybe you’ve spent so many years taking care of others that you haven’t had time to think about what lights you up. (I was the soccer coach for my son’s teams when they were under 8’s and I loved it, but I have no interest in soccer. I just loved helping them have fun)
Maybe you’re at a stage in life where your interests have shifted, and what used to excite you just doesn’t anymore. (I enjoyed being a Mum of little kids, but a day babysitting now is exhausting.)
Whatever the reason, discovering what you love doing isn’t always as simple as it sounds.
The good news? You can figure it out. It’s never too late to reconnect with your passions, and the process can be a fun and rewarding journey. So, where do you start?
Step 1: Pay Attention to What brings you Joy
Happiness often hides in the small, everyday moments. If you’re not sure what you love, start noticing what makes you smile, feel relaxed, or lose track of time.
- What do you naturally gravitate toward? Do you love organising, reading, cooking, or helping others?
- What makes you lose yourself? If you’ve ever been so absorbed in something that you forgot to check your phone, take note—that’s a clue.
- What do you talk about a lot? If a certain topic always gets you excited in conversation, it might be a passion waiting to be explored.
Step 2: Revisit Your Childhood Interests
Think back to when you were younger, before responsibilities took over. What did you love doing just for fun? Did you draw, dance, write stories, play pretend, or spend hours outside? Often, our childhood interests give us valuable insight into what makes us happy.
If you don’t remember, try asking someone who knew you back then. You might be surprised at what they recall!
Step 3: Make a “Passion List”
Grab a notebook and write down anything and everything that might interest you. Don’t worry about whether you’re good at it or whether it’s practical—just let your curiosity lead.
To get started, consider these categories:
- Creative pursuits (painting, photography, writing, music)
- Physical activities (dancing, hiking, yoga, gardening)
- Learning & growth (languages, history, psychology, DIY projects)
- Helping others (mentoring, volunteering, coaching)
- Solo vs. social activities (Do you enjoy things you can do alone, or do you prefer group experiences?)
Step 4: Experiment with New Things
Sometimes, the best way to find what you love is by trying something new. Give yourself permission to experiment without pressure.
- Sign up for a class (art, cooking, dance, writing, pottery—you name it!)
- Try a new hobby for a month and see how it feels
- Say yes to an invitation that normally wouldn’t interest you. (This is my new behaviour. I say yes. Yes to 4WD Fraser Island – glad I went, glad I don’t have to do that again. Yes to learning how to do line dancing – a definite maybe to do again. Yes to going on a cruise – that a definite one to do again. I would never have done any of these if someone hadn’t asked and I had an attitude of saying yes.)
- Spend time with people who have different interests and learn from them. (I have been kayaking a few times because the people I hang out with love it. )
The key is to stay open and allow yourself to enjoy the process without expecting instant passion.
Step 5: Notice What Energizes You (and What Drains You)
After trying different activities, reflect on how they make you feel. Pay attention to:
- What excites you and makes you feel alive
- What leaves you feeling drained or uninspired
- What you look forward to doing again
Your passions should give you energy, not deplete it. If something feels like a chore, it might not be the right fit.
Step 6: Ditch the “All or Nothing” Mindset
One mistake people make is thinking that passions have to be all-consuming or lead to a career change. Not true! You don’t have to turn your passion into a side hustle, nor do you have to be amazing at it for it to be worthwhile.
It’s perfectly okay to:
- Have multiple small passions instead of one big one
- Do something purely for fun with no expectations
- Change interests over time—passions evolve just like we do
Step 7: Ask Yourself These Key Questions
If you’re still feeling stuck, try journaling on these questions:
- If time, money, and skill weren’t an issue, what would I love to try?
- What do I admire in others that I wish I could do?
- When was the last time I felt truly excited about something?
- What do I find myself daydreaming about?
- What do I love learning about just for the sake of it?
Step 8: Give Yourself Permission to Enjoy the Journey
Discovering what you love isn’t about finding a single “right” answer—it’s about exploring and enjoying the process. There’s no deadline, no wrong choices, and no pressure to be perfect.
So go ahead—try new things, embrace curiosity, and give yourself permission to love what you love. You might just surprise yourself with what you find.
What’s something you’ve always wanted to try but haven’t yet? Drop a comment below—I’d love to hear about it! 💛
Kay x